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Tuesday, September 29, 2015

Agent Barnes

Mini story for your reading pleasure, by Yours Truly.

   There was a serene sky outside the sleek, stainless-clad windows, which beheld a view of a poor neighborhood with a river winding through it. Elevated several stories from the ground, the office itself was posh. Several steel file cabinets set in one corner, adorned with silver edging. The floor was a cool, off-white marble tile with black and white veins running through. A skinny, pale man in a light gray suit sat in a plush, white leather chair, seemingly preoccupied with his silver computer monitor and keyboard, and not the burlesque, well-built man in the chair across the modern style desk. He wore a darker suit, sitting rigidly in his chair and running his eyes across the room constantly, as if scanning for hazards.
   "Let's run over the mission again, Agent Blake," said the pale man. "Your job is to plant the nuke in the southern Syrian town, and avoid getting caught before then. You'll have all the resources and men you need."
   "I don't like this, Agent Barnes. Innocent people are going to die, just to scathe ISIL," said Blake worriedly.
   "I don't care if you have a problem with it. We both know why you're actually here." He turned the sleek computer monitor so Blake could see his own file. There was red lettering to one side. Blake's expression didn't change, but his face paled slightly under his short beard as he eyed Barnes.
   "If you don't, someone else will. But you're the best man for the job. So, if you don't..." Barnes raised his eyebrow and planted his leather dress shoes on the desk, while turning the monitor back toward himself.
   Blake hesitated further, jaw working with no sound emerging. His hands clenched his suit, wrinkling the corner. Perspiration beaded around his forehead. Finally,
   "I'll do it."

   Agent Barnes smiled, his skinny finger lightly tapping "delete" on the keyboard. 

Sunday, September 13, 2015

Why Republicans are More Likely to Reject Climate Science

   So, first off I get ready to insult a few people! However, if you're actually reading this, it means either you've already been insulted by the headline, or  you're likely a liberal and reading this post will just reaffirm your beliefs. (Usually I like to keep beliefs out of climate science, but since beliefs are mostly what prevents the public from accepting climate science, we will be talking about beliefs. It's rather like Bones' dislike of physchology on the popular TV show Bones.)
   So, why are Republicans more likely to think climate science is quackery and several thousand respected scientists have been paid off by some socialistic scheme to control the entire planet? I believe that issue is extremely complicated, and involves many variables, such as peer pressure and ideology identification, to name a few. These terms refer to the fact that people are inclined to believe in a set standard of beliefs and morals that match with the people and ideologies that they associate with. In other words, if you're a conservative listening to Rush Limbaugh, every time he jokes that hybrid drivers are "morally superior financially illiterate hippies," or some such, it reaffirms the ideology set that you've associated with, whether or not you actually think that hybrid drivers fall into that category.
   So, doesn't everyone have certain disagreements with the people that they hang out with? Maybe - but only about 53% of the public believe that scientists agree on climate change. The reality is that 97% of climatologists agree that the data confirms that climate change is a reality. Notice that I did not saw they "believe" it is happening. This is not a matter of beliefs; believing climate change is not an issue is essentially like believing the earth is flat; it really doesn't matter what you believe, because it's there. However, due to propaganda and such, likely on part of the oil industry, the public and politicians have turned the issue into a political issue.
   This is understandable, in a way. Since it will involve policy changes and decisions, it automatically becomes a political issue as soon as scientists suggest that we attempt to make changes. Thus, people then hear from the politicians - who freely admit that they are not scientists, which somehow excuses them from not understanding basic scientific principles. Senator Inhofe throwing a snowball in the Senate is a prime example of scientific ignorance and a poor understanding of the issues. A blizzard, even across the whole US, does not negate climate change, because not only must we think globally, we must think of the whole earth - because data has now shown that the oceans are likely to be responsible for absorbing the bulk of the heat from climate change. [1]
   The recent temperature slowdown is proof of at least two things. 1. It shows that scientists are not fudging data, which is a rather absurd belief to begin with, since they would likely just continue to increase their numbers, and 2. There are still a lot of things we don't understand. This is something scientists are willing to admit - unlike many politicians and citizens.
   This is also understandable. People do not like being told they are wrong. It rubs them the wrong way, damages their ego, and causes them to second guess themselves. We shouldn't be going after the general public. We need to be going after the main culprits - politicians with monetary agendas and oil and other anti-environmental businesses. These businesses resist at every opportunity, and are deeply ingrained in how the world works right now. However, and this is speculation, I suspect that it would not be entirely too difficult for these companies to jump into wind, solar, nuclear, and other cleaner sources of energy. We need to let people, businesses, and politicians know that the status quo is inherently dangerous, and that it is going to severely damage the planet if we don't make meaningful change, and soon.
  We can do this in a variety of ways. The new "slacktivism" may even be able to help - this entails sharing environmental posts to your friends, signing petitions online, and other things that pop up. Like your local environmentally conscious groups on Facebook so they show up in your feeds. If you feel inspired, go out and get active.
   I realize I've strayed quite severely from the original topic, so I apologize for that. Ultimately, party differences don't paint a very good line in the general public - but Congress has been highly polarized on a variety of issues for quite some time, and it is not surprising that climate change has similarly been polarized. Let's try to wade across party differences and make some meaningful change for each other, the country, and the world.

Why Global Warming Can't Be True

It might seem impractical to say something like this, but it actually has good potential to be quite practical. For example, we will be able to focus almost exclusively on business as usual once we show why climate change can't be true. It's what we all really want; to know the reasons why it can't be right, and how we can continue living our lives exactly the way we were before. So, this article is meant to empower those individuals who were searching for that loophole. It's not really a way out. It's just affirmation of what we knew, deep down, was correct.

Tip #1: Realize the scientists are probably wrong.
But don't 97% of scientists agree it's a problem? Sure. But did you know we don't have reliable temperature records from before the thermometer was invented? How can scientists honestly tell us how historic climates were when Rome didn't even keep temperature records? We've only got about a century of very reliable records, never mind that the global average temp keeps going up! The climate fluctuates all the time anyways, which you well know if you ever tried to plan a camping trip.

Tip #2: It's their fault for building there in the first place.
Rising sea levels? Don't worry - Antartica gains ice every winter! Or, wait, does it gain ice in the summer, since the earth tilts away from the sun during summer? Or it is during winter, I can't seem to remember. Anyways, they built in the lowlands, it's their fault for getting flooded routinely! If Florida disappears, we'll just send the snowbirds to Canada for their summer bake.

Tip #3: The economy needs to keep expanding. Climate change would get in the way!
You're absolutely right, you know. If climate change continues on it's current course, there could be a massive amount of legislature in place preventing businesses from working the way they want to. There may not be an natural resources left after baking, but that was probably from all those chemtrails.

Tip #4: This would be incredibly inconvenient! You might have to change, even radically.
So don't! Realize that your opinions and views trump science from around the globe. Respected scientists from many fields are unworthy of your attention - you have responsibilities to the status quo. Eventually you'll make enough money to buy that gas guzzling V12 Jaguar, and then people will respect you. No one will respect you if you cut back on consumption. By the way, we happen to have an unlimited amount of resources for infinite expansion. We will never have to fight a war over resources to keep the economy growing. Just look at the stock market for proof. Always going up (and down and up and down again, but that's beside the point).

Tip #5: Realize there are some highly vocal people who agree with you!
Some of them even wear lab coats. I doubt the label inside has a Big Oil sponsor printed on it - that's only something Wind and Solar do, because they have all the money. Just look at the Upside Down Fortune 500 list for proof.

Tip #6: Realize Al Gore invented the internet.
We don't trust Al Gore! He's just a slimy politician, and we also don't like him, so everything he says must be false. Never mind all the scientists and universities and everything - they just invented reason and logic, which would be disastrous to this argument.

For further reading, check out this Big Think article on how to deny scientific consensus on just about any subject:

5 Easy Tips for Denying Scientific Consensus

Very helpful stuff there! For an in depth explanation of what will almost certainly NOT happen if we keep up with Business As usual, read:

The Next Genocide

That's all for now! I'll be selling Portable Buckets of Sand very soon, which are quite useful in the event you don't live next to a handy desert. Yet.